So I was a Bad Dog, Mad Dog, for an Hour

When they calmed down, I told them to withhold that information (their parents' names) from me at least until I could relate the reasons for their visit, lest I, too, become overtaken with hyper-ventilating hysteria.
While they were drinking their sodas, I advised them that I was far from a dog expert but nevertheless, should a dog in whatever degree of fervor and of any size charge at you, to stay absolutely still, try to stay absolutely calm (a deep breath and even longer exhale really helps), not look at the dog (absolutely no eye contact), even turning sideways if time permits, not raise their hand in any manner and to remember that any dog will sense whatever degree of anxiety or fear they might have.
I pantomimed, in slow motion, what their reaction should be (I couldn't use my dog because she was too comfortably stretched out.) When the aggressive, charging dog stops or starts sniffing and circling (and it will)- still not to look at the dog but take a small step in its direction (yes - toward the dog) with your hands still preferably at your sides. Virtually any dog, again- short of a trained attack dog - will usually calm down. Then, again without looking at the animal and being careful to avoid physical contact take another small step towards the dog.
The real secret is in staying calm, perhaps by thinking of some pleasurable experience or good grade. I concluded with: "then, if the dog still proceeds to bite you, I'll be glad to drive you to the hospital to get your stitches."
Although those few simple steps have helped me many times I could only hope it would help these five lovely children, whose names by themselves would evoke an infinite variety of reactions from others.

cont'd